| After
your humans give you a bath, DON'T LET THEM TOWEL DRY YOU! Instead,
run to their bed, jump up and dry yourself off on the sheets. This is
especially good if it's right before your human's bedtime.
Act like a convicted criminal. When the
humans come home, put your ears back, tail between your legs, chin
down and act as if you have done something really bad. Then, watch as
the humans frantically search the house for the damage they think you
have caused. (Note: This only works when you have done absolutely
nothing wrong.)
Make your humans be patient. When you
are outside to "go pee," sniff around the entire yard as your humans
wait. Act as if the spot you choose will ultimately decide the fate of
the earth.
When out for a walk, alternate
between choking and coughing every time a strange human walks by.
Make your own rules. Don't always
bring back the stick when playing fetch with the humans. Make them go
and chase it once in a while.
Hide from your humans. When your
humans come home, don't greet them at the door. Instead, hide from
them, and make them think something terrible has happened to you.
Don't reappear until one of your humans is panic-stricken and close to
tears.
Wake up twenty minutes before the
alarm clock is set to go off and make the humans take you out. As soon
as you get back inside, fall asleep. Humans can rarely go back to
sleep after going outside. This will drive them nuts! |